The weekend did not start well. A cough that I picked up “working” the the Morristown Brewfest in March materialized into an actual cold on Friday. I felt like crap. Standard marathon training calls for carbo-loading before the event. Treatment of the common cold calls for drinking plenty of fluids. Hmm. With a game tomorrow, if only there was a magical elixir that combines fluids with carbs. Hello Mr. Pabst!!
This was to be my first game of the season, so I could not miss it. On an overcast Saturday on the Great Oyster Bay, the Morris Lions would merge with the Long Island Ducks to form the Mucks. This all-star team would face the Gentlemen of NY. After the 1st period, the Gents would have a 5-0 lead. Numerous bad passes and offensive breakdowns would hinder the Mucks. In the 2nd stanza, the Gents would open up a 19-0 lead, before the Mucks would rally with a couple of tries to close to 19-10. Although it was my first game, I was in midseason form. I had a couple of runs, dodging, juking, throwing defenders aside. My game is all about speed. Total forward progress for all my runs? Maybe 5 meters, but who is looking at such minor details. Defensively, add in a couple of ole tackles. Yup, midseason form.
Early in the 3rd, off of a Muck penalty, the Gents would make a questionable strategic decision. Masters rugby is frequently mano-a-mano action, my swinging Johnson is bigger than yours. With a penalty awarded to the Gents directly in front of the posts, instead of trying to ram the ball into the try zone, the Gents would elect to KICK!! Even the Gents sideline was howling with displeasure. Oh, disgracia. Nonplussed, Croatian rap star Goose (he was #1 in Croatia in 1992!! ) would shut his ears to his teammates booing and slot the kick. Long Island Ralph would cherry pick a Gent pass to run if for a quick score, but the final score was Gents 29-15.
After the game, in our brief social before Morris would brave the Cross Bronx to get home to see the Morris Men play, we would catch up with old friends. Marcello, a Gent of Italian heritage from Britian was telling me about his latest innovation. After capitalizing on a pent up demand for Italian gin (who knew?), he was expanding his empire to rum. He has rums from those renowned rum loving countries of France (?!?!) and the Philippines. He did extensive research for his rum, even travelling to Manila. It was there that he came up with this observation: There are a lot of beautiful women in the Philippines, MANY of whom happen to be female.
I also got a chance to talk with Welsh Tom of the Gents. Most people already know about the practice of UK pediatricians prescribing a small Guinness each day for medicinal purposes. Tom’s Mum took the practice 1 step further. Putting a feeding tube in through her innie directly inserted into the fetus that later be known as Tom. He was then given his own I.P.A. (not India Pale Ale, but In situ Placenta Ale). His love of beer continues to this day.
After a quick knosh, it was back to Morris in an effort to see the Morris Masters-in-Training students play a D2 playoff game against New York. By the time we battled the Cross Bronx and returned to Pocono Field, the Mens team had done well without us. A 25-10 lead was extended to 35-15 as the final hooter sounded.